Redemption

Redemption
Suggested by: Marc Delcort Fradera

I'm struggling.

As I sit here on the battlefield that is my life, I take in the air around me and wonder where I went wrong. There are no real, physical weapons around me, yet the fields, for miles, are soaked with the blood and tears of those I have crossed paths with. I don't know how it happened. What I once thought of as right has, apparently, been very, very wrong.

It was a mistake, throwing myself into the fray; a battle that had nothing to do with me in the first place. Yet somehow, despite coming in ill-prepared and without the knowledge of it's beginnings, nor fully understanding the manner in which this war was to be fought, I managed to break through the line, disarming and cracking the armor of my now foes, rendering them as defenseless to me as I was to them. With nothing but the words in my head, and my ink-stained hands, I have decimated everything around me, leaving behind the devastation and destruction that only I could bring upon their lives.

And here I am now, sitting amongst the corpses of my friends. No, they were never my enemies; I never would have been able to get in as close as I have had they been. All it took was the war raging on in my head to burst out, without thought or consideration, to cause so much pain, so much grief, for myself and all the others. Where do I go from here?

All I wish for now is for atonement, to be cleared of the words that now bind me to those souls that I have placed into a strange purgatory; they placing me in the fires of the Hell they have dreamed up for me, burning my very essence from their memories. If I could buy back the words that cut through so deeply, I would. I've gathered every penny that I could find, though, and I still find myself coming up short.

So I'll walk these fields forever, soaking my feet in the bloodshed of my own casting, searching for a way to expiate myself from the errors that I have committed. Hopefully, one day, I can be resurrected and granted a chance to make it up to them. I want nothing more than to be seen as redeemable, because I know, in my heart, I am.

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